Our Story of Struggles, Survival and Success...

The Beginning of Oh Beautiful Release...


I have always dreamt of owning my own business and never expected it would become a reality. Yet here I am and I could not be more proud, the journey that lead me here isn't the most pleasant but the future is looking bright...

At the age of 22 I met an older man who I planned on spending the rest of my life with. I was lead to believe he was a family man, family orientated, loyal and honest. Everything I could want as a single mummy. He wanted a baby and I wanted to keep him happy, so I quickly fell pregnant, desperate to do anything to make him love me as much as I loved him.

I remember doing the pregnancy test, I was thrilled to get the positive result and couldn't wait to tell him. But he still had control over me for years to come. Butt he wouldn't come home from the pub and I had to tell him in a text message. My heart broke there and then as reality hit not only was I not enough for him but even now I was carrying his baby we weren't enough. I was extremely poorly throughout my pregnancy suffering with hyperemesis, I was hospitalised and placed on a drip. If I was lucky he'd visit...if only to tell me he'd pulled down the pub or won a date on some stupid auction at the pub! Just what I wanted to hear whilst feeling and looking my worst.

My daughter was born at home, while I pushed he held my hand and in his other hand he held a can of beer. Typical really! Things never got any better. At one point he was so drunk he dropped our baby from standing height and landed flat on his face on top of her. I pulled him off and scooped her into my arms shouting at him to explain himself. As I went into the kitchen he followed me and pinned me in the corner by the radiator booting me repeatedly while I cradled our baby daughter in my arms, the whole time hurling abuse at me.

Later id go on to find empty beer cans and vodka bottles under the sink, in our daughters wardrobe, under her cotbed. I decided enough was enough and we separated. I never really realised it at the time but he still had control of me for years to come. I would be accused of being a cheat and a liar as well as other hideous insults being thrown at me any time I attempted to move on or even made friends with someone of the opposite sex. Without realising it I was continuously being emotionally and mentally abused on a daily basis, all the time I carried guilt towards him and was still desperate to keep him happy. I would continue to sleep with him because if I didn't it meant I didn't fancy him anymore and I must have someone else so to prove I hadn't moved on I would do it to keep him quiet and happy and save me from the insults and accusations. I would take beatings from him, being beat with the hoover pipe till my leg was black and blue, being smashed around the face with his trainer at full force. Even though I was technically single I took it all and kept my mouth shut. 

He'd always been abusive towards me but never raised a hand to my daughters in front of me. So our daughter would stay at his every other weekend. Until 29 th December 2017when for the last time he was bladdered whilst she was in his care. I had given him chance after chance and I refused to put her at risk ever again. I picked my daughter up and as the months went on she began to open up about how he had hit her older half sister and how he would stand on my daughters hands and feet on purpose and beg her not to tell me he had been drinking. 

My daughter made the super brave and grown up decision not to have contact with her dad again. I cant lie it was a relief that I didn't have to worry about her anymore. It also gave me strength to walk away...and stay away. A strength I had never had before. My oldest daughter has memories of him hitting me, pinning me down by my throat. She was also super relieved he was no longer a part of our lives. We are so much happier and more settled now, we call ourselves the three amigos. We are so close and give each other strength, our bond is unbreakable. 

So back to the business and how Oh Beautiful Release came to be...as I say I have always wanted my own business and to make my daughters proud. So whilst deep in thought one night I thought about how we could turn our negative experience into something positive. Along came...

Oh Beautiful Release, from one of my favourite songs Sarah Mclachlan's Angel. It was the ideal name and perfect for the purpose I was to serve...Oh Beautiful Release works to raise awareness of domestic abuse, sending a small donation from each sale to Nottinghamshire Independent Domestic Abuse Services. I wanted to share our story in the hopes of inspiring others to stand up and speak out. I want to demonstrate how it is possible to turn a negative experience into something super positive. 

My aim is to empower and encourage women to feel special again, to know that there is always someone who truly cares and to make that all important bit of ME time. As a sinlge mummy and a survivor of domestic abuse I can appreciate and understand how important those little things are and how much they mean. 

I source all my perfect products from small family run businesses as I believe hugely in supporting each other and helping each other grow. I create gorgeous gift bags and beautiful boxes filled with perfect products all handmade with natural ingredients. We also supply one off gorgeous gifts for all occasions or as a little pick me up present or me time treat. 

As we branch into children's gifts I aim to encourage positive relationships and building bonds  whilst boosting self esteem and aiding anxiety. I have recently began working on a range of affirmation cards which will be aimed at empowering and uplifting and inspiring children, teens and adults. There will also be arrange aimed at looked after and adopted children and women who have survived domestic abuse.

My daughters and our story are my inspiration they gave me the strength, drive and determination to grow and succeed. tThey fill me with enthusiasm and hope for the future. I have achieved my goal and made my daughters proud by making our dream come true. I have demonstrated to them anything is possible with hard work. We went through hell but we haven't let it break us, we have bounced back bigger better and stronger than ever.

You can live your dream too, you can make your dreams come true. I believe in you...

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